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Yo Mama Jokes

 

 

Yo mama's so stupid that it took her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes! 

Yo mama's so stupid that when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran out the door with a spoon. 

Yo mama's so dumb that when she saw the "Under 17 not admitted" sign at a movie theatre, she went home and got 16 friends. 

Yo mama is so stupid that when she went for a blood test, she asked for time to study. 

Yo mama's so dumb that she got locked in a grocery store and starved! 

Yo mama is so stupid that she tripped over a cordless phone! 

Yo mama is so stupid that she sold her car for gas money! 

Yo mama is so stupid that that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order! 

Yo mama is so stupid that she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Dr. Pepper. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she thought Delta Airlines was a sorority. 

Yo mama is so dumb that she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds! 

Yo mama is so stupid that she bought a videocamera to record cable tv shows at home.

Yo mama is so stupid that when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "OK". 

Yo mama is so stupid that she spent twenty minutes lookin' at an orange juice box because it said "concentrate". 

Yo mama is so dumb that she asked me what yield meant, I said "Slow down" and she said "What... does.... yield... mean?" 

Yo mama is so stupid that she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team! 

Yo mama is so stupid that she thinks Tiger Woods is a forest in India. 

Yo mama is so dumb that she put on her glasses to watch 20/20. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she climbed over a glass wall to see what was behind it. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she failed a survey. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she stopped at a stop sign and waited for it to say go. 

Yo mama is so stupid, she went to the aquarium to buy a Blu-Ray. 

Yo mama is so stupid that I told her I was reading a book by Homer and she asked if I had anything written by Bart. 

Yo mama's so dumb that she tried to commit suicide by jumping out of the basement window. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she needs twice as much sense to be a half-wit.

Yo mama is so stupid that she thought brownie points were coupons for a bake sale. 

Yo mama is so stupid that when the computer said "Press any key to continue", she couldn't find the 'Any' key. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she thought Tupac Shakur was a Jewish holiday. 

Yo mama is so stupid that when I was drowning and yelled for a life saver, she said "Cherry or Grape?" 

Yo mama's so dumb that she sat in a tree house because she wanted to be a branch manager. 

Yo mama is so stupid that I saw her jumping up and down, asked what she was doing, and she said she drank a bottle of medicine and forgot to shake it. 

Yo mama is so stupid that when she locked her keys in the car, it took her all day to get the family out. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she got locked out of a convertible car with the top down. 

Yo mama is so stupid that when she pulled into the drive-thru at McDonald's, she drove through the window. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she put 2 quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 cent. 

Yo mama's so dumb that she was on the corner with a sign that said "Will eat for food." 

Yo mama's so dumb that in the 'No Child Left Behind' act there's a provision that exempts yo mama. 

Yo mama's so dumb that she got locked in a Furniture store and slept on the floor. 

Yo mama's so dumb that she peels M&M's to make chocolate chip cookies. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she leaves the house for the Home Shopping Network. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she brought a cup to the movie "Juice." 

Yo mama is so stupid that she uses Old Spice for cooking. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she threw a rock the ground and missed. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she went to the store to buy a color TV and asked what colors they had. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she tries to email people by putting envelopes into her computer's disk drive. 

Yo mama is so stupid that when she took an IQ test, the results came out negative. 

yo mama so stupid that she though Jar-Jar came with Pickles-Pickles. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she thought St. Ides was a Catholic church. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind

Yo mama is so stupid that she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she makes Beavis and Butt-Head look like Nobel Prize winners. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she took a spoon to the superbowl. 

Yo mama is so stupid that that she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she got stabbed in a shoot out. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she sits on the TV, and watches the couch! 

Yo mama is so stupid that she took a umbrella to see Purple Rain. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she ordered her sushi well done. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she got fired from the M&M factory for throwing away all the W's. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she put on a coat to chew winterfresh gum. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she put a quarter in a parking meter and waited for a gumball to come out. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she ordered a cheese burger from McDonald's and said "Hold the cheese." 

Yo mama is so stupid that she thinks Taco Bell is a Mexican Phone Company. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she thinks Christmas Wrap is Snoop Dogg's holiday album. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she ran outside with a purse because she heard there was change in the weather. 

Yo mama is so stupid that I told her Christmas was just around the corner and she went looking for it. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she tries to insult you with yo mama jokes. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she put a peephole in a glass door.

Yo mama is so stupid that I saw her in the frozen food section with a fishing rod. 

Yo mama is so stupid that when she heard 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved. 

Yo mama is so stupid that when she saw a "Wrong Way" sign in her rearview mirror, she turned around. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she swallowed a battery and said "I got the power!" 

Yo mama is so stupid that she called the 7-11 to see when they closed.

Yo mama is so stupid that she sold the house to pay the mortgage. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she thought meow mix was a record for cats. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she took lessons for a player piano. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she said "what's that letter after x" and I said Y she said "Cause I wanna know". 

Yo mama is so stupid that when she asked me what kinda jeans I wore, I said Guess and she said "Ummm... Levis?" 

Yo mama is so stupid that if she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless. 

Yo mama is so stupid that it takes her an hour to cook minute rice. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she asked for a price check at the dollar store. 

Yo mama is so stupid that on her job application where it says emergency contact she put 911. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she can't make Jello because she can't fit 2 quarts of water in the box. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she thinks a stereotype is the brand on her clock-radio. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she thought a lawsuit was something you wear to court. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she sent me a fax with a stamp on it. 

Yo mama is so stupid that I saw her walking down the street yelling into an envelope, asked what she was doing, and she said sending a voice mail. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she tried to drown a fish. 

Yo mama is so stupid that if you gave her a penny for her thoughts, you'd get change. 

Yo mama is so dumb that she thought Mick Jagger was a breakfast sandwich! 

Yo mama is so stupid that when she took you to the airport and a sign said "Airport Left," she turned around and went home.

Yo mama is so stupid that when she went to take the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she asked you "What is the number for 911?" 

Yo mama is so stupid that she thinks a quarterback is a refund! 

Yo mama is so stupid that she bought a solar-powered flashlight! 

Yo mama is so stupid that she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she picked up the phone and asked "What button do I push?" 

Yo mama is so stupid that when she worked at McDonald's and someone ordered small fries, she said "Hey Boss, all the small one's are gone." 

Yo mama is so stupid that she got hit by a parked car. 

Yo mama is so stupid that when her husband lost his marbles she ran to the store and bought him new ones. 

Yo mama is so stupid that when they said they were playing craps she went and got toilet paper. 

Yo mama is so stupid that when I asked her if she wanted to play one on one, she said "Ok, but what's the teams?" 

Yo mama is so stupid that she thinks Johnny Cash is a pay toilet! 

Yo mama is so stupid that when the judge said "Order in the court," she said "I'll have a hamburger and a Coke." 

Yo mama is so stupid that she thinks socialism means partying! 

Yo mama is so stupid that she thinks deadbeat is a type of music. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she put two M&M's in her ears and thought she was listening to Eminem. 

Yo mama is so stupid that at bottom of application where it says Sign Here - she put Scorpio. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she wouldn't know up from down if she had three guesses. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she once attempted to commit suicide by jumping off a curb.

Yo mama is so stupid that she put on bug spray before going to the flea market.

Yo mama is so stupid that she stole free bread. 

Yo mama's so dumb, she called me, then asked for my phone number. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she locked her keys inside a motorcycle. 

yo mama so stupid that she got locked inside a motorcycle. 

yo mama so stupid that she went to the dentist to get a bluetooth.

yo mama so stupid that she bought tickets to Xbox Live.

yo mama so stupid that whenever someone rings the doorbell, she checks the microwave. 

yo mama so stupid that when she broke her VCR, she bought a video tape on how to fix your VCR. 

Yo mama is so stupid that she tried to drop acid but the car battery fell on her foot.

Yo mama is so ugly that when she went to a beautician it took 12 hours... to get a quote! 

Yo mama is so ugly that she looked out the window and got arrested for mooning. 

Yo mama is so ugly that people go as her for Halloween. 

Yo mama is so ugly that she turned Medusa to stone! 

Yo mama is so ugly that the government moved Halloween to her birthday! 

Yo mama is so ugly that she scares the roaches away. 

Yo mama is so ugly that she scared the crap out of the toilet. 

Yo mama is so ugly that... well... look at you! 

Yo mama is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror, the reflection looks back and shakes its head. 

Yo mama is so ugly that she looks like she's been in a dryer filled with rocks. 

Yo mama is so ugly that she makes blind children cry. 

Yo mama is so ugly that she climbed the ugly ladder and didn't miss a step. 

Yo mama is so ugly that the last time I saw something that looked like her, I pinned a tail on it. 

Yo mama is so ugly that we put her in the kennel when we go on vacation.

Yo mama is so ugly that her shadow ran away from her. 

Yo mama is so ugly that she could scare the flies off a shit wagon. 

Yo mama is so ugly that her birth certificate contained an apology letter from the condom factory. 

Yo mama is so ugly that that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye. 

Yo mama is so ugly that she tried to take a bath and the water jumped out! 

Yo mama is so ugly that when she walks down the street in September, people say "Wow, is it Halloween already?" 

Yo mama is so ugly that her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her. 

Yo mama is so ugly that when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras. 

Yo mama is so ugly that they didn't give her a costume when she auditioned for Star Wars. 

Yo mama is so ugly that even Rice Krispies won't talk to her! 

Yo mama is so ugly that when she uploaded a photo of herself to a computer, it was rejected by the anti-virus software. 

Yo mama is so ugly that when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals." 

Yo mama is so ugly that she could make a freight train take a dirt road. 

Yo mama is so ugly that that when she sits in the sand on the beach, cats try to bury her. 

Yo mama is so ugly that when she drove past area 51, she was thought to be extraterrestrial life. They took her away never to be seen again. 

Yo mama is so ugly that they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints